Usually you can bind ZigBee devices together. I have multiple IKEA "rodret" switches bound to generic ZigBee smart plugs from Aliexpress. Works great, with minimal latency.

With zha, you can bind them together from the Home Assistant device page.

I usually favor an architecture that can work without Home Assistant, such as standalone ZigBee dimmers, or contactors that can work with existing wiring. Home Assistant brings automation on top, but it doesn't matter much if it breaks (I mostly notice the shutters not opening with sunrise). Then Internet connectivity can bring additional features, but most things still work if it's down.

I'd say it has been pretty solid for years, and I don't stress too much when I have server issues.