You obviously have some very non-standard definitions at work here. apply/map/collect are just higher order operations, they have nothing to do with reification, except that you need the functions that are arguments to be first class.

> dataflow programming is almost always considered functional programming

That turns out not to be the case. Dataflow programming shares some aspects with functional programming, they are not the same at all.

> Object oriented, by contrast, is all about hidden state and mutation.

That also turns out not to be the case at all. Heck, there were even object-functional programming languages.

> And increasing evidence suggests that MVC doesn't work beautifully today because it doesn't parallelize,

What does MVC have to do with parallelization, in your humble opinion?