I can't speak beyond my own experiences, but yeah the "social butterfly" phenomena is also a bit of a lie.

It's rare to see someone just walk into a business as a total outsider and charm their way in. See how well they handle unfamiliar people. Most of them will stay in their bubble. When you and your unfamiliar people are all nerds, you're actually in the best position to figure them out. They try to take the easy way out with flattery. Something like: "Oh, you all are so smart I couldn't possibly comment." before running back to their people. Does that really seem like a "social butterfly" to you?

Networking is one thing, but nepotism is another. I don't like working with people who can drag everyone else down. Small businesses are more vulnerable than anywhere else, yet that's where you see it most often.