> And of course the exclusion. Inside a group, then outside it. People I ate lunch with went quiet. The chats went quiet. I became a story other people told carefully.

This is why I don't rely on workplace being the place where friendships happen. Whenever I feel like there's friendship growing, I add that person on some app, and then we meet outside of work. In that way even if we part ways professionally, we can still be friends privately. I spam people with game screenshots, pics of food, and racist rants. I invite them to gatherings and outings.