The biggest case for building bespoke software is that you drop your attack surface area and it’s not as lucrative to hack one person. Don’t even expose it to the internet if you don’t need to and just run Tailscale.
This is probably correct if you aren’t a target at all, e.g. you aren’t running a business
Tailscale got hacked recently as well, didnt they (?). I think they did, the whole system is poisoned, because I believe one of the vectors had to do with eMudhra certs, which again, is not an issue specific to them, or something they had any say on it... there is literally no escape these days it would seem.
I think you've just explained why people rent infrastructure.