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sillysaurusx • yesterday at 6:52 PM • 5 replies • view on HN

The fact that someone's sex life would factor into the decision at all is so backwards.

First, polyamory has been gaining popularity. But a lot of poly people I've met keep that strictly secret, because their friends and family wouldn't understand and would judge them harshly.

Second, the problem isn't that he slept with someone other than his wife (we don't know what kind of agreements they have in place, and ENM is a thing in 2026). It's that he slept with a subordinate. And that's a real problem due to the power differential that exists between him and his employees.

So it's not the second affair per se, but bad judgement. Dating at companies should only happen parallel in the hierarchy, not up or down.

What I'm pushing back on is the notion that someone should be judged simply for fucking someone who isn't his wife. There's a reason people keep ENM agreements a secret, due to the judgmental attitude from the public at large.

Hopefully alternative lifestyles will become normalized to the point where our descendants in 30 years will look back on us with the same disappointment that we look back in 1996 gay marriage laws.

ENM among older couples is particularly common. But sure, it's always possible that Jensen was just cheating on his wife without consent. The thing to watch for is whether his wife has expressed unhappiness publicly about the situation. Notice that in articles like https://archive.is/Ubg4k they'll do everything but ask her how she feels. Or if they have, it's possible she's refused to say anything on the topic. That silence means something, and we don't know what. So hold off on the judgments until we have confirmation that she's actually unhappy with it.


Replies

kube-system • yesterday at 7:13 PM

The issue is not his personal life -- the issue is that he has brought a spy into a position to compromise the company.

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chasd00 • yesterday at 7:38 PM

Sex or not “catastrophically bad judgement” and “CEO” are fundamentally incompatible.

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itake • yesterday at 6:58 PM

Do you think Bill and Melinda Gates should never of happened?

outside1234 • yesterday at 7:00 PM

1. He had sex with a spy 2. He had sex with a direct report.

This isn't a story about the sex

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